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Novelette Mysteries of Life
Mysteries of Life, a novelette
Chapter One: Frieda had a boyfriend from India named Savin. Frieda and Savin got along
sometimes but when he felt closer to Frieda he called her names. Frieda didn’t know why he
did that, but he did. At one point she blamed his 'fear of intimacy'. Frieda invited him to come
over to her house and watch a movie that she recorded and Savin told her to send him the
DVD instead. Apparently he wanted to watch it by himself. Frieda said to herself, “What an
insult. I ask him to do something with me and he focuses on the thing and not on the doing it
with me.” Frieda shares with him what it feels like to be an African American in America and
he tells her that she is an immature sissy cry baby black bitch. Basically, he insults her and
calls her names with a racial overtone if not directly racist. Quite naturally, Frieda backed
off. To an objective observer, what has happened to the relationship is clearly his fault. Frieda
has been making efforts to get closer, but he rejects her in multiple ways. Frieda says to
herself, “He is simply rejecting me and there is not much I can do about it. Certainly it is not
anything that I have done wrong. I must write him off as just another racist bigot. I will
maintain a distant friendship but never will I be caught in a romantic relationship with him.
It only makes sense to keep my distance from now on.”
Chapter Two: Years later Savin writes Frieda notes and says that he has figured out what was
wrong with their relationship. Savin tells Frieda that she was just going through her “Indian
Phase”. He is glib about it and makes it sound like perhaps Frieda was prejudiced against
Indians but that there was a brief period in her life during which she dated Indians, in spite of
herself. The period is over, in his opinion, simply because Frieda’s ‘Indian Phase’ is over.
Frieda reads his message and her jaw drops to the floor. She cannot believe that anyone could
be so stupid as to possibly blame the failure in the relationship on her. Frieda rereads Savin’s
note. It is clear. Here it is: “In my note yesterday I mentioned God only knows why you came
after me...but I remember now...it was because you were in your Indian phase...and you
neighbor conveniently had an Indian co-worker/friend...and you had just run your course
with your existing Indian boyfriend. thinking of that now...I am not flattered.”
After reading the note from her Indian friend Savin, Frieda concludes that it is a common
human fallacy to believe that one is right and that the fault is with the other person. That is all
Savin is doing. He is blaming Frieda rather than remembering the insults he tossed at her.
Frieda decides that Savin is not really conscious in the normal human social sense of the
word. Normal conscious human beings have a model in their mind of the other person’s
mind. Before they say something to someone, they picture what it will sound like to the other
person. Clearly Savin’s brain does not function in this manner. Savin can call Frieda a ‘black
bitch’ and it doesn’t occur to him that he has insulted her to the core. He thinks that she will
simply brush such comments off and they will end up lovers once again. Ahh, poor Savin—
socially unconscious of how his words have destroyed his relationship. But no mind—Savin
will simply blame Frieda for the problems and live ever after with his social blindness.
At one point in the past, Frieda told Savin to read the book called “Games People Play”. She
thought that he might recognize his problem if he read the book. The book outlines the
various patterns of action that people often get themselves into without realizing it. What
Frieda noted about Savin was that when she was disinterested in him, he seemed to want to
work on the relationship. When Savin’s desire for closeness was obvious to Frieda, she
increased her hope that the relationship would work out and returned the warmth. The
problem was that, just like the examples in the book, when Frieda showed increased interest,
Savin got hostile and started hurling his usual insults. Savin seemed rational on occasion
and so Frieda suggested that Savin read the book “Games People Play” and perhaps it would
do him some good. Savin’s response was another jaw-dropper. He told Frieda that since he
had not read the book, he couldn’t be engaged in any of the activities described in the book.
Frieda said to herself, “That is like saying that I cannot speed on the highway because I have
not read a book about speeding on the highway.”
No doubt, he will go on and get close to other women, then insult them when he feels too close
to them. This pattern is likely to repeat itself over and over with a similar result. Frieda said
to herself, “It is best to realize the way Savin is and accept him as a friend without ever trying
to get too close again. If I do, all I will get is another figurative kick in the shins.”
The End
Mysteries of Life, a novelette
Chapter One: Frieda had a boyfriend from India named Savin. Frieda and Savin got along
sometimes but when he felt closer to Frieda he called her names. Frieda didn’t know why he
did that, but he did. At one point she blamed his 'fear of intimacy'. Frieda invited him to come
over to her house and watch a movie that she recorded and Savin told her to send him the
DVD instead. Apparently he wanted to watch it by himself. Frieda said to herself, “What an
insult. I ask him to do something with me and he focuses on the thing and not on the doing it
with me.” Frieda shares with him what it feels like to be an African American in America and
he tells her that she is an immature sissy cry baby black bitch. Basically, he insults her and
calls her names with a racial overtone if not directly racist. Quite naturally, Frieda backed
off. To an objective observer, what has happened to the relationship is clearly his fault. Frieda
has been making efforts to get closer, but he rejects her in multiple ways. Frieda says to
herself, “He is simply rejecting me and there is not much I can do about it. Certainly it is not
anything that I have done wrong. I must write him off as just another racist bigot. I will
maintain a distant friendship but never will I be caught in a romantic relationship with him.
It only makes sense to keep my distance from now on.”
Chapter Two: Years later Savin writes Frieda notes and says that he has figured out what was
wrong with their relationship. Savin tells Frieda that she was just going through her “Indian
Phase”. He is glib about it and makes it sound like perhaps Frieda was prejudiced against
Indians but that there was a brief period in her life during which she dated Indians, in spite of
herself. The period is over, in his opinion, simply because Frieda’s ‘Indian Phase’ is over.
Frieda reads his message and her jaw drops to the floor. She cannot believe that anyone could
be so stupid as to possibly blame the failure in the relationship on her. Frieda rereads Savin’s
note. It is clear. Here it is: “In my note yesterday I mentioned God only knows why you came
after me...but I remember now...it was because you were in your Indian phase...and you
neighbor conveniently had an Indian co-worker/friend...and you had just run your course
with your existing Indian boyfriend. thinking of that now...I am not flattered.”
After reading the note from her Indian friend Savin, Frieda concludes that it is a common
human fallacy to believe that one is right and that the fault is with the other person. That is all
Savin is doing. He is blaming Frieda rather than remembering the insults he tossed at her.
Frieda decides that Savin is not really conscious in the normal human social sense of the
word. Normal conscious human beings have a model in their mind of the other person’s
mind. Before they say something to someone, they picture what it will sound like to the other
person. Clearly Savin’s brain does not function in this manner. Savin can call Frieda a ‘black
bitch’ and it doesn’t occur to him that he has insulted her to the core. He thinks that she will
simply brush such comments off and they will end up lovers once again. Ahh, poor Savin—
socially unconscious of how his words have destroyed his relationship. But no mind—Savin
will simply blame Frieda for the problems and live ever after with his social blindness.
At one point in the past, Frieda told Savin to read the book called “Games People Play”. She
thought that he might recognize his problem if he read the book. The book outlines the
various patterns of action that people often get themselves into without realizing it. What
Frieda noted about Savin was that when she was disinterested in him, he seemed to want to
work on the relationship. When Savin’s desire for closeness was obvious to Frieda, she
increased her hope that the relationship would work out and returned the warmth. The
problem was that, just like the examples in the book, when Frieda showed increased interest,
Savin got hostile and started hurling his usual insults. Savin seemed rational on occasion
and so Frieda suggested that Savin read the book “Games People Play” and perhaps it would
do him some good. Savin’s response was another jaw-dropper. He told Frieda that since he
had not read the book, he couldn’t be engaged in any of the activities described in the book.
Frieda said to herself, “That is like saying that I cannot speed on the highway because I have
not read a book about speeding on the highway.”
No doubt, he will go on and get close to other women, then insult them when he feels too close
to them. This pattern is likely to repeat itself over and over with a similar result. Frieda said
to herself, “It is best to realize the way Savin is and accept him as a friend without ever trying
to get too close again. If I do, all I will get is another figurative kick in the shins.”
The End
